{"id":4003,"date":"2018-04-09T13:00:32","date_gmt":"2018-04-09T13:00:32","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/christinalaurenbooks.com\/Clo2\/?p=4003"},"modified":"2018-04-09T13:00:32","modified_gmt":"2018-04-09T13:00:32","slug":"love-and-other-words-chapter-5","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/christinalaurenbooks.com\/Clo2\/2018\/04\/love-and-other-words-chapter-5\/","title":{"rendered":"LOVE AND OTHER WORDS – Chapter 5"},"content":{"rendered":"

Tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow! Ack we’re so excited! We’re back with our final update before on sale, and we love this section because you really see that in that single chance meeting, Elliot has already turned Macy’s life upside down. WE LOVE IT. What will happen? Will they see each other again? When will they kiss? Will there be a happily ever after? (of course!)\u00a0 Answers soon! Find us on twitter<\/a> and let us know what you think and as always, happy reading!<\/p>\n

Now <\/strong><\/p>\n

Wednesday, October 4<\/em><\/p>\n

I feel like I\u2019ve torn open some stitches overnight. Everything inside is raw\u2014as if I\u2019ve bruised an emotional organ. Above me, the ceiling looks drab; water stains crawl along the spidery cracks in the plaster that radiate from the light fixture in the ceiling. The fan circles lazily around and around and around the frosted globe. As they turn, the blades cut through the air, mimicking Sean\u2019s rhythmic exhale while he sleeps beside me.<\/p>\n

Chh. <\/em><\/p>\n

Chh.<\/em><\/p>\n

Chh. <\/em><\/p>\n

He was asleep when I got home around two this morning. For once, I\u2019m thankful for the long hours; I don\u2019t know how I would have sat through dinner with him and Phoebe when all I could think about was Elliot showing up at Saul\u2019s yesterday.<\/p>\n

I had this momentary clench of guilt last night on the bus home, when the chaos of my shift was slowly ebbing from my thoughts and the run-in with Elliot pushed its way back in. In a panicked burst, I wondered how rude it was of me to not introduce Elliot to Sabrina.<\/p>\n

So fucking quickly he comes back, front and center.<\/p>\n

Sean wakes when I move to rub my face, rolling to me, pulling me close with his hand curled around my hip, but for the first time since he kissed me last May, I feel like I\u2019m betraying something.<\/p>\n

Groaning, I push away and sit up, propping my elbows on my knees at the side of the bed.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou okay, babe?\u201d he asks, moving close behind me and resting his chin on my shoulder.<\/p>\n

Sean doesn\u2019t even know about Elliot. Which is crazy, when I think about it, because if I\u2019m marrying him, he should know every part of me, right? Even if we haven\u2019t been together that long, the big things should be placed right up front, and for most of my adolescence, it doesn\u2019t get much bigger than Elliot. Sean knows I grew up in Berkeley, spent many weekends up in the wine country of Healdsburg, and had some good friends there. But he has no idea that I met Elliot when I was thirteen, fell in love with him when I was fourteen, and pushed him out of my life only a few years later.<\/p>\n

I nod. \u201cI\u2019m good. Just tired.\u201d I feel him turn his head beside me and glance at the clock, and I mimic his action. It\u2019s only 6:40, and I don\u2019t need to start rounds until 9:00. Sleep is a precious commodity. Why, brain, why? <\/em><\/p>\n

He runs a hand through his salt-and-pepper hair. \u201cOf course you\u2019re tired. Come back to bed.\u201d<\/p>\n

When he says this, I know he really means Lie back down and let\u2019s have some of the sex before Phoebs is up. <\/em><\/p>\n

The problem is, I can\u2019t risk the chance that doing that with him will feel wrong now.<\/p>\n

Fucking Elliot. I just need a couple of days of distance from it, that\u2019s all.<\/p>\n

Purchase it today<\/h3>\n